My newest pet peeve is the question that every retail sales person asks me now, when completing a transaction at a store:

“Would you like your receipt with you or in the bag?”

Every salesperson asks. Could be at the grocery store, could be at the gas station, could be Target, could be anywhere where money is exchanged to receive goods.  Since when did this become an option that must be communicated every time we buy something? Are we really that attached to our receipts that we need to know where they are at all times?

It irritates me to no end. It’s like nails on a chalkboard to me. People don’t ask “How are you today?” or “Did you find everything you were looking for?” Instead, it’s “Would you like your receipt with you or in the bag?”   Can’t you just put the receipt in the bag, and if I’m that anxious to have it, I could actually reach into the bag and get it out?  Is this really the only thing we have to say to each other?

In the old days, oh, two or three years ago – only every once in a while were you asked this question. I’m fine with every once in a while. But every time? In every store? Maybe it’s just me, and the universe is trying to tell me something. See if you notice it and let’s compare notes.

I’ve decided I’m going to start replying with a smart alec comment in response to that question.  Like this:

Salesperson: “Would you like your receipt with you or in the bag?”

Me: “The bag feels lonely – put the receipt in the bag to keep it company.”

or

Me: “What’s a receipt?”

or

Me: “Yes.”